Wow… last night’s show brooked no middle ground. Reviewers either loved it or hated it. I lean more toward “hated it” – it was a bad idea to take this group and attempt to force standards on them, take away their instruments, and force someone else’s arrangements on them. The judges’ inane comments only made it worse.
On his morning/afternoon/evening (depending on where your Clear Channel station airs it) radio show, Ryan Seacrest says tonight’s elimination will “raise a few eyebrows”. Needless to say, that has provoked sky-is-falling rumors that Crystal got voted off. I doubt it, but the way this season has gone, anything is possible. Besides, would getting voted off be bad for Crystal? She’d be free of the winner’s contract with 19 – she’d probably be off contract at the end of the tour…
…time to get down to the Season 9 Final Four…
Showtime: 9:00 pm Eastern
We start with the montage… backstage and onstage from last night… before we find out what the nation says… TONIGHT~!?
THIS… is American Idol! *cue the music*
There were 32 million votes last night (all texted by 8 bored eighth-graders in Wenatchee)… we’re reminded that Lady Gaga is “here” (on tape) and Harry Connick Jr. is live… we meet the judges… get a tour plug… and bring out the Final Five for a Sinatra medley in the Officially Awkward Lip-Synch Group Song. (Yes, all of that in the first 7 minutes. We’re apparently in a rush.)
Back with next week’s info: “Songs of the Cinema” with Jamie Foxx. This could be… interesting.
But something that’s not interesting first… the Pointless Ford Video. If, because you hate yourself, you want to see all of the Ford videos, go to the AI website.
Tonight’s backstage montage is a look at how Tuesdays have changed for the contestants – in other words, contrasting their pre-Idol lives to their Idol performance-day lives. Do they REALLY have stand-in judges who were hired for their superficial resemblance to the real judges? Oy…
It’s odd seeing the Final Five in their Awkward Group Lip-Synch tuxedos. It’s about all I’m taking away from this segment, as Ryan is asking obvious questions and getting obvious answers. At least, until we dim the lights…
- Lee is asked to go to center stage with Ryan, where he’s told that he is safe.
- Yes, that’s it for the results in this segment
And… we go to the tape. Here’s Lady Gaga with “Alejandro”. I don’t quite “get” her. Maybe you can figure her out.
We’re back with Ryan and the judges… and another montage. This time, it’s “Harry Connick Jr.: Superstar Mentor”, which naturally leads into a performance by Justin Bieber. No, I kid. Of course, it’s Harry Connick Jr., singing “Sinatra does the Beatles”… I mean… “And I Love Her” as it would have been done by Sinatra. I think. Maybe Dean Martin. I’ll ponder this. But not too hard.
And as if the feeding of Mr. Connick’s ego hadn’t gone far enough, the Final Five are now going to lip-synch some of his music. With his accompaniment. OK, no other mentor has been fellated to this extent in the three years I’ve been watching Idol… and it has to be an artist about whom I am aggressively indifferent… thanks, Clive. You’ve really made MY night…
This segment shows no signs of ending, as Connick gets to tell about how he met Sinatra. This is American Idol, right? Not a talk show… right? Right?
break… finally… have I gotten across how fed up I am with the idea that the Idol finalists had to sing Sinatra because Clive Davis was involved in Connick’s most recent album? If not… then clearly you aren’t reading this part… 🙂
Hey, it’s 9:48 pm… WE CAN HAZ REZLTS NAO?
- Crystal is asked to stand, and here we go with the damn groups again… call hers Group 1.
- Michael, after his critique, starts Group 2.
- Aaron gets to join Michael.
- So which group is the Bottom Two? Crystal/Casey or Michael/Aaron?
- Ryan actually had the guts to ask Lee if he’d choose which duo was safe. Lee tried to hide inside the tuxedo.
- Safe: Crystal and Casey.
- Bottom Two: Michael and Aaron.
break… So Casey survives to murder another song next week. I’m typing this live, I promise… Michael’s going home. The tweens will pull Aaron through.
Back for the final verdict:
- It’s over for… Aaron. Michael is safe. VFTW victory. (EDIT: I forgot they switched to Casey after the show last night… either way, VFTW wins again) I’m somewhat surprised.
- Aaron sings out with “Fly Me To The Moon” (like he had a choice?)…
Your late local news is next. 🙂
By way of comparison:
- AI8’s Final Four: Kris Allen, Danny Gokey, Allison Iraheta, Adam Lambert.
- AI9’s Final Four: Crystal Bowersox, Lee Dewyze, Casey James, Michael Lynche.
The big difference? Nobody’s as flamboyant as Lambert… and there is a risk that Crystal’s fate will duplicate Allison’s, which means she’d be gone next week. That scenario has Casey playing Gokey and leaving in third… and Lee and Michael to go for the contract. I’m not quite sure that’s how it plays out, but it could be interesting.
OK, go take the survey. See you Tuesday.