After a somewhat lackluster “Rat Pack” show, someone goes home tonight as we move to the final four… with just 5 performers and one hour to kill, what kind of fluff are we in for? Only the producers know for sure… because THIS is the day Fox sent the President to cable… and THIS… is American Idol! *music cue*
Nice of Fox to jump the start before 9:00. Not that we missed much, but still… respect your DVR audience, Fox.
With 47 million votes in the bag, we start with 5 and will end with 4… but first, let’s meet the judges who are doing their damndest to overshadow the singers… and let Simon blow some smoke…
Oh, wow! We can watch the awful Ford videos at the Idol website! Since we can, I’ll go take care of business during this week’s Ford video, which happens to air now. I guess in some small way, I’m sorry Ford didn’t go on the government dole, as they’d have been forced to stop sponsoring these videos. And the video ended before I could type this paragraph…
…in time for the Awkward Group Number. Give them credit, “I Got Rhythm” (1930, George & Ira Gershwin) has more swing than almost all of last night’s show.
Back in time for an Idol birthday party. Well, I did ask for fluff.
Dim the lights… at 9:13 PM…
- Matt is first on the firing line. Seacrest parks him stage right.
- Danny is next. He goes stage left.
- Allison is next. She joins Danny stage left.
- Kris gets called next. He joins Matt stage right.
- Adam goes last. Ryan asks Adam which pairing he thinks he’s going to be standing with, and Adam picks Allison and Danny. He picks wrong. Seacrest puts him with the other two, and announces…
- Allison and Danny are safe. Matt, Kris, and *ADAM* are the bottom three. Oh… my… goodness.
The Game Show NewsNet calls it Chaos Theory – the “safe” performers wind up in the bottom three because their fans think they don’t have to vote. The “not safe” performers get a ton of votes because their fans are terrified of losing them. I’d say this is an extreme case of Chaos Theory, though.
After the break… the daughter of a standards legend… it’s Natalie Cole with “Something’s Gotta Give” (1954; Johnny Mercer, McGuire Sisters).
We go backstage where the Bottom Three have been exiled, pending their results… and a break… and this week’s Idol alumna, Taylor Hicks.
I have a feeling Glee is going to sink like a brick…
Wow, Taylor Hicks looks older than me. And I’m old.
OK, here we go, the bottom three are back to become the bottom two. Dim the lights, it’s 9:37 PM…
- Kris is safe. Matt and Adam are the bottom two. It was nice knowing you, Matt. The judges’ save bought you two extra weeks.
Another break, and a song from this week’s mentor, Jamie Foxx, before
Matt is dispatched we get the final announcement…
He’s got a point – at this stage, it may not matter who wins, as all five may wind up with careers out of this. Of course, it may also turn out that none of them do. Such is the entertainment business.
We’re back… and Seacrest is taunting Simon about his predictions for tonight (again). Hey, Fox… 30-minute results shows next season. I wasn’t going to say it. You made me.
Dim the lights, it’s 9:52 PM.
- The unsurprising announcement: Adam is safe. Matt Giraud will now sing his swan song.
Wow, they even have to fill time after the swan song. Really, 30-minute results shows are all you need. Really.
The final four sing “rock’n’roll” next week (two songs each, one hopes) with Slash (Guns N’ Roses, Velvet Revolver). Your late local news is next.